July

Betty told me more about her relationships in her life. I was telling her my recent guy experiences and she was giving me insight. She told me that passion and romance are the most important. I assmed she was referring to her second relationship, because she had said before that her marriage wasnt filled with love. But she said that her second relationship with phil was just more of a friendship/brotherly for her and more romantic for him. She then told me that there was one man with which she experienced true love, filled with all the stereotypical things that are only seen in movies. She met him through a chatroom online that she was in oneday at work...they emailed back and forth and decided to meet each other. She had to lie to phil and tell him she was going out with the friends but she met him instead at a coffee shop...they met at 7pm and continued talking until 1 am when the shop closed. 2 days later she randomly drove to his apartment to say hi, because she couldnt stop thinking about him....which she says was unlike her, she was never one to be the outgoing/make the first move type. But she did it and they began there love affair ...meeting every day if possible. She said she never felt so loved and when they made love she said she enjoyed it which was an experience she didnt know could actually happen.
this amazes me...i was watching this tv show called "swingtown" which shows the lives of 3 women in the 70's . It shows the struggle that women had to go through in order to have their own opinions, and do their own things and know what was giong on in the world without a man's permission. It sickens me that the world used to exist with the belief that a woman existed only for a man to order around and dominate. Some things are even still this way today....
I look at my relationships with men and i over analyze and consider what would trully make me happy. In a world where so many people settle for ordinary...i continue to wait for the extroardinaory....i trully believe that you can tell quickly if you are meant to be with someone or not, so why waste precious time with someone that is just okay instead of taking time and waiting for the magic to arrive. Love is a rare thing, i trully believe that a majority of the people who claim they have found it really havent, and instead are settling for something because they are so afraid of being alone. Im chronically single for this reason. Until someone sweeps me off my feet, I will continue to be independent....and live for only me.....