i wanted to write about this because it is hilarious and all the rage of our nursing school.
a few weeks ago when temps were in the negative 30's one night, a non-compliant diabetic male, thought it was hot, so he pushed his bed up to his window and stuck his feet out the window and went to bed...needless to say, in the morning, he had black feet....he has been transferred from a few hospitals and a few girls have had him as a pt, including my rooomate....lesson: when its in the negative temps, dont stick your feet out the window and go to sleep, no matter how hot you may be
Thursday, January 29, 2009
mono plagues my life.
i could very well leave the entry at that and it would accurately sum up everything in that short sweet sentence.
but i guess i wont .
ive been feeling better, fine even...going out about my business, attending my first clinical last thursday where i had the pleasure of whiping old lady ass for the nurse i was supposed to be shadowing. i mean, they told us not to do anything jsut watch but somehow i get stuck whiping butt, and draining catheters filled with bloody urine....love my life.
and then i went to Mark's for the weekend, had a fabulous time, ignored my swollen lymph nodes. sobbed on the phone to Julia on the phone as i drove back to toledo about how much i hate being in school away from her and mark and just want to graduate already and get our apartment...we agreed that the more we look forward to it the more upset we get because we arent there. Julia found an apartment shaped like a castle near her boyfriends new home that he bought...he told her that she shouldnt judge her apartments based off of how hilarious it would be when we invite people over.....thats just typical me and julia though...i would live in a dump on the inside if the outside was shapped like something sweet....got to get those kicks in.
anyways, i skipped school monday because i was plagued again, and then i came home wednesday to see a REAL doctor (not a 'rent-a-doc' as we lovingly call the physicians at the health center)...she was appaled at the largeness of my lymph nodes, mom even compared them to the size of a clementine orange...i kid you not they are really that huge....i laughed because people have probably been thinking i was exaggerating and they kept refusing to medicate me...but i will seriously sue the health center if anything more damaging happens because no one should have golf ball sized lymph nodes. anyways, i fought over the phone with mom at the doc office ( its just not right for a 22/23 year old to put her mother on speaker phone while seeing a doctor...sorry, mom....a man waiting in the office overheard this fight, starting laughing and told me not to worry, he was 38 and his dad still did that....uhhh great.) and then my lovely doctor whom i have been seeing for years and years says to me "WOW, those are HUGE" and prescribed me the steroid i have been declaring i needed since that beautiful day my blood was taken and came back to me positive for mono. and now i am 2 days into steroidal bliss, still not feeling any releif in terms of pain....all my lymph nodes are still swollen, but the one particuluar clemenitine orange is now more the shape of a cherry tomato...so i have high hopes for each day to come.
if this does not work i have to get blood work done and then see an ENT
needless to say, mom made me skip clinical yesterday. which was good because I was in a lot of pain and up a lot at night because i could barely swollow. my clinical instructor was cool about it and wrote me an email telling me to call her because shell work out some sort of schedule for me to make up the clinical before spring break, and shes concerned i have mono so i need to talk to her but i havent gotten a hold of her yet.
im up to date on homework, with the exception of some note taking i missed, and a few readings ill get caught up over the weekend. all in all things are pretty good.
i have a new comforter on my bed that i stole from home, my apartments heat only works from 2pm to 5 pm...and 5 am to 7 am....we dont know really why that is....but oh well...we have space heaters. so i wont freeze tonight ....besides ive been really sweaty dreaming lately anyways.
i told you mono plagues me.
i could very well leave the entry at that and it would accurately sum up everything in that short sweet sentence.
but i guess i wont .
ive been feeling better, fine even...going out about my business, attending my first clinical last thursday where i had the pleasure of whiping old lady ass for the nurse i was supposed to be shadowing. i mean, they told us not to do anything jsut watch but somehow i get stuck whiping butt, and draining catheters filled with bloody urine....love my life.
and then i went to Mark's for the weekend, had a fabulous time, ignored my swollen lymph nodes. sobbed on the phone to Julia on the phone as i drove back to toledo about how much i hate being in school away from her and mark and just want to graduate already and get our apartment...we agreed that the more we look forward to it the more upset we get because we arent there. Julia found an apartment shaped like a castle near her boyfriends new home that he bought...he told her that she shouldnt judge her apartments based off of how hilarious it would be when we invite people over.....thats just typical me and julia though...i would live in a dump on the inside if the outside was shapped like something sweet....got to get those kicks in.
anyways, i skipped school monday because i was plagued again, and then i came home wednesday to see a REAL doctor (not a 'rent-a-doc' as we lovingly call the physicians at the health center)...she was appaled at the largeness of my lymph nodes, mom even compared them to the size of a clementine orange...i kid you not they are really that huge....i laughed because people have probably been thinking i was exaggerating and they kept refusing to medicate me...but i will seriously sue the health center if anything more damaging happens because no one should have golf ball sized lymph nodes. anyways, i fought over the phone with mom at the doc office ( its just not right for a 22/23 year old to put her mother on speaker phone while seeing a doctor...sorry, mom....a man waiting in the office overheard this fight, starting laughing and told me not to worry, he was 38 and his dad still did that....uhhh great.) and then my lovely doctor whom i have been seeing for years and years says to me "WOW, those are HUGE" and prescribed me the steroid i have been declaring i needed since that beautiful day my blood was taken and came back to me positive for mono. and now i am 2 days into steroidal bliss, still not feeling any releif in terms of pain....all my lymph nodes are still swollen, but the one particuluar clemenitine orange is now more the shape of a cherry tomato...so i have high hopes for each day to come.
if this does not work i have to get blood work done and then see an ENT
needless to say, mom made me skip clinical yesterday. which was good because I was in a lot of pain and up a lot at night because i could barely swollow. my clinical instructor was cool about it and wrote me an email telling me to call her because shell work out some sort of schedule for me to make up the clinical before spring break, and shes concerned i have mono so i need to talk to her but i havent gotten a hold of her yet.
im up to date on homework, with the exception of some note taking i missed, and a few readings ill get caught up over the weekend. all in all things are pretty good.
i have a new comforter on my bed that i stole from home, my apartments heat only works from 2pm to 5 pm...and 5 am to 7 am....we dont know really why that is....but oh well...we have space heaters. so i wont freeze tonight ....besides ive been really sweaty dreaming lately anyways.
i told you mono plagues me.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
blah
This past weekend, i slept in until 1, woke up and went back to bed around 2, got up again at 5:30/6 and went back to bed about 11/12 and repeated. for 3 days. it was glorious ....i felt so much better entering this week of classes with an extra day off, but then today i felt sick again....i wish i had a needle syringe that i could insert into my lymph nodes to drain the fluid that has them so swollen, that seems to be the only solution.
other than that life is pretty peachy keen. Im still planning on heading to kentucky this weekend to see boyfriend, and we are getting a puppy! im so excited. i have tons of work to get done to have a weekend ofplay, thankfully wed. are my free day.
Im going to dinner with kate tonight, which im so looking forward to, this girl and i share an old soul and truly if anyone understands me and listens without judgement its her.
its a unique thing.
ive been thinking a lot of the story we are fed as children in terms of love. Girls grow up reading Cinderella, Snow White, The Little Mermaid. That whole "someday my prince will come" but prince isnt someone who grows up in a castle about to become king searching high and low for his princess who is treated horribly by somoene in her own world and needs rescuing. this fairy tale is adapted that all girls end up with this rediculous expectation of men. That in his 20's he will be good looking, dashing, a gentlemen from a rich family in a 200-300,000 home with married parents and a loving family that has no kinks, and everyone has those perfect corporate jobs that they love and this man has never touched anything that we deam as inappropriate, in fact he has never made a mistake, he lives life perfectly, with purpose and determination, always knowing exactly what he wants, never cries, never gets scared, never has drama....he drives the car, has the bank account, gives you gifts, puts up with your crap, and has a plan for his life always, and it never goes wrong...
i admit i had fallen to this. but now i open my eyes and realize that this expectation for a human is rediculous, we are at the very core a fallible human being who will make mistakes and will learn and grow from them.
we have to be understanding that not everyones past is a fairy tale, everyone has some skeletons in teh closet, no one has lived a perfect life. Poor men, who have to live up to some rediculous expectation. (but i know girls do to, dont forget i am feminist)
so if im dating someone that not everyone thinks has his life put together, that people think i can do better, that maybe he isnt perfect well my answer is, nobody is perfect and when you can appreciate that fact in others, then you are truly in love.
no one has there lives figured out. ask a 60 year old man what he wants to do wit his life and chances are it isnt what hes doing, and if it is then bless than man and let him tell me his secret.
my mom always says "when i grow up i want to be....."
my megan always says "this is NOT my career, its just my job"
we do what he can to get by, we dont always have it all figured out, and maybe we arent supposed to
because i read this book and it said that we cant constantly worry about the future, we have to let the future take care of its self because it hasnt happened yet, so to worry about something that hasnt even happened, and to make scenerios adn what we will do in each of those, our response to each of those, is silly...because it doesnt even exist yet.
i like that approach and i am going to adapt it into my own life
for all we have is this moment, and this moment is your life. so live it.
p.s. there really was no thread through these thoughts, just rambling about things on my mind.
other than that life is pretty peachy keen. Im still planning on heading to kentucky this weekend to see boyfriend, and we are getting a puppy! im so excited. i have tons of work to get done to have a weekend ofplay, thankfully wed. are my free day.
Im going to dinner with kate tonight, which im so looking forward to, this girl and i share an old soul and truly if anyone understands me and listens without judgement its her.
its a unique thing.
ive been thinking a lot of the story we are fed as children in terms of love. Girls grow up reading Cinderella, Snow White, The Little Mermaid. That whole "someday my prince will come" but prince isnt someone who grows up in a castle about to become king searching high and low for his princess who is treated horribly by somoene in her own world and needs rescuing. this fairy tale is adapted that all girls end up with this rediculous expectation of men. That in his 20's he will be good looking, dashing, a gentlemen from a rich family in a 200-300,000 home with married parents and a loving family that has no kinks, and everyone has those perfect corporate jobs that they love and this man has never touched anything that we deam as inappropriate, in fact he has never made a mistake, he lives life perfectly, with purpose and determination, always knowing exactly what he wants, never cries, never gets scared, never has drama....he drives the car, has the bank account, gives you gifts, puts up with your crap, and has a plan for his life always, and it never goes wrong...
i admit i had fallen to this. but now i open my eyes and realize that this expectation for a human is rediculous, we are at the very core a fallible human being who will make mistakes and will learn and grow from them.
we have to be understanding that not everyones past is a fairy tale, everyone has some skeletons in teh closet, no one has lived a perfect life. Poor men, who have to live up to some rediculous expectation. (but i know girls do to, dont forget i am feminist)
so if im dating someone that not everyone thinks has his life put together, that people think i can do better, that maybe he isnt perfect well my answer is, nobody is perfect and when you can appreciate that fact in others, then you are truly in love.
no one has there lives figured out. ask a 60 year old man what he wants to do wit his life and chances are it isnt what hes doing, and if it is then bless than man and let him tell me his secret.
my mom always says "when i grow up i want to be....."
my megan always says "this is NOT my career, its just my job"
we do what he can to get by, we dont always have it all figured out, and maybe we arent supposed to
because i read this book and it said that we cant constantly worry about the future, we have to let the future take care of its self because it hasnt happened yet, so to worry about something that hasnt even happened, and to make scenerios adn what we will do in each of those, our response to each of those, is silly...because it doesnt even exist yet.
i like that approach and i am going to adapt it into my own life
for all we have is this moment, and this moment is your life. so live it.
p.s. there really was no thread through these thoughts, just rambling about things on my mind.
Friday, January 16, 2009
MONO
since before christmas i have had swollen lymph nodes on my throats, just obnoxious...
decided to go to the Health center on campus today, because i was convinced i had an infection of some kind and needed and antibiotic.
got blood work drawn, and i have MONO.
no wonder i am so tired, and warn out.
so now im laying on the couch, on a friday freezing night....succumbing to the illness that i have been pushing aside to ignore for a while now.
oh the luck.
decided to go to the Health center on campus today, because i was convinced i had an infection of some kind and needed and antibiotic.
got blood work drawn, and i have MONO.
no wonder i am so tired, and warn out.
so now im laying on the couch, on a friday freezing night....succumbing to the illness that i have been pushing aside to ignore for a while now.
oh the luck.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
freezing temps
I have applied for 4 jobs in cincinnati. Hopefully i will hear back, but dont really expect to until March or April. After my leadership and Management class on tuesday, I learned that it is a tough job market out there for new grad RN's, not as easy as we have all thought and been told it would be. Most hospitals are looking for Nurses with at least year experience and more. It costs a hospital a lot more to hire a new grad due to the training and insurance. There were 4 new grad opening at a hospital in Cinci, i applied for 2 of those opening: Surgical, and Geriatric....I also applied for 2 openings at another hospital one in ER and the other LTAC (long term acute care)...those two didnt say they were looking for new grad, but had no listing as far as experience needed so hoping for the best. I am unsure where I want to work specifically, will determine that after interviews, and surgical preceptorship...but those are my main interests so far i believe. I will be graduating a gerontology minor after all, i thought i wouldnt because it turned out one of the classes i took didnt apply to the minor, so i was 2 credits short...but after emailing back and forth with gero profs they determined that they would take my nursing gero class from last semester and apply to the minor. So hopefully this will put me a bit over the edge with the competition for the Gero jobs.
things at school are getting a bit better. sort of adjusting to the stress i knew would be this semester, but its still a worry hearing about the hesi and nclex
blogs are probably going to be constantly about Nclex, Hesi, and school...so boring im sure but they are my life.
something a bit more interesting, in one week i will be back with my boyfriend which cannot happen soon enough. i miss him so incredibly much, i fear i have become a dependent girlfriend, the kind i have always made fun of. its wierd to believe that something you share with someone is so unique and yet common sense tells you it isnt. i never believed i could feel this way, like people in the movies seem too...this is so sappy, the cynical side of me is strongly scolding myself.
the cynical me is waiting for something back to happen. The in love part of me is saying this could be forever. but the part of me that is trying to gain a better hold of my life says that i shouldnt really worry about either side and just focus on today, and what is happening in this moment. and in this moment, i am at school...missing my boyfriend....
tomorrow i have Hesi prep class followed by the first perioperative class where i hope to learn more about my preceptorship, perhaps who i am following, where, and what type of hours i will be working...
today i had orientation at Flower for Med/surg. my clinical instructor was pretty school, seemed down to earth and it might be okay. even though i will never have an interest in med/surg nursing.
but things are pretty intense this semester, as anyone can tell.
things at school are getting a bit better. sort of adjusting to the stress i knew would be this semester, but its still a worry hearing about the hesi and nclex
blogs are probably going to be constantly about Nclex, Hesi, and school...so boring im sure but they are my life.
something a bit more interesting, in one week i will be back with my boyfriend which cannot happen soon enough. i miss him so incredibly much, i fear i have become a dependent girlfriend, the kind i have always made fun of. its wierd to believe that something you share with someone is so unique and yet common sense tells you it isnt. i never believed i could feel this way, like people in the movies seem too...this is so sappy, the cynical side of me is strongly scolding myself.
the cynical me is waiting for something back to happen. The in love part of me is saying this could be forever. but the part of me that is trying to gain a better hold of my life says that i shouldnt really worry about either side and just focus on today, and what is happening in this moment. and in this moment, i am at school...missing my boyfriend....
tomorrow i have Hesi prep class followed by the first perioperative class where i hope to learn more about my preceptorship, perhaps who i am following, where, and what type of hours i will be working...
today i had orientation at Flower for Med/surg. my clinical instructor was pretty school, seemed down to earth and it might be okay. even though i will never have an interest in med/surg nursing.
but things are pretty intense this semester, as anyone can tell.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
a long awaited update
Im back at school, im my cold bedroom, sitting on my air bed.
Havent blogged in a while, since it was christmas break you would think id have more time to blog, but due to the laptop being left at school, and my constant travelling and jam packed scheduled, this wasnt the case,
but, alas, i have returned to finish up one last semester of school...its hard to believe in 4 short months i will be graduating and headed somewhere else, away from the area ive spent the last 5 years. im so excited. I actually cannot wait to get out of Toledo, OH....this is much evident to me after my break.
i spent most of my break with the boyfriend (not non-boyfriend any longer). My nana calls it my little honeymoon after honeymoon. i guess in a lot of ways it felt like that since I stayed with him and lived with him for a few days of sweet bliss. It was wonderful. He is my best friend in so many ways, and the person that brings out the truest form of myself....its hard to be away from him now. but we have some visits planned over the semester, and the "i wish i was with you" conversations have begun again that took place all of the last 8 years of our lives together. I cant believe our story and all weve been through together, and how after all of this time we are finally at this place we must have been intended to be.
it looks for now my postgrad plans have been finalized in my mind. I am going to be moving to cincinnati and living with Julia. this makes me so excited~! i was researching the hospitals in the area there and the opportunites are endless. it seems every area ive ever even considered for nursing has job openings. so i think i am going to just apply to every single one of them and trust ill be placed where i am intended to be.
I had dinner with Laura from Nicaragua today. It was so good to see her. I expressed to her my loneliness I feel in coming back to school, how i feel like i dont have anyone really close to me here, and feel so very on my own and without a close close friend. She understood me completely and i know that i have her. I just need to make more time for her.
still i do feel like i am alone. when greer is in cali, julia goes back to nh, and bf is so far away...it just feels kind of empty. but i know all of these pieces will be coming together and this can be a good reflection time to work on me, and of course focus on school which on day 2 is already stressing me out. i have no idea how im going to pass the HESI exam, NCLEX, let alone every single quiz, test, lab check-off, preceptorship, and 4 patient clinical rotation.
guess ill do it somehow
p.s. see aunt lucy, i didnt complain about you on here!!! (i know you're faithfully reading!)
Havent blogged in a while, since it was christmas break you would think id have more time to blog, but due to the laptop being left at school, and my constant travelling and jam packed scheduled, this wasnt the case,
but, alas, i have returned to finish up one last semester of school...its hard to believe in 4 short months i will be graduating and headed somewhere else, away from the area ive spent the last 5 years. im so excited. I actually cannot wait to get out of Toledo, OH....this is much evident to me after my break.
i spent most of my break with the boyfriend (not non-boyfriend any longer). My nana calls it my little honeymoon after honeymoon. i guess in a lot of ways it felt like that since I stayed with him and lived with him for a few days of sweet bliss. It was wonderful. He is my best friend in so many ways, and the person that brings out the truest form of myself....its hard to be away from him now. but we have some visits planned over the semester, and the "i wish i was with you" conversations have begun again that took place all of the last 8 years of our lives together. I cant believe our story and all weve been through together, and how after all of this time we are finally at this place we must have been intended to be.
it looks for now my postgrad plans have been finalized in my mind. I am going to be moving to cincinnati and living with Julia. this makes me so excited~! i was researching the hospitals in the area there and the opportunites are endless. it seems every area ive ever even considered for nursing has job openings. so i think i am going to just apply to every single one of them and trust ill be placed where i am intended to be.
I had dinner with Laura from Nicaragua today. It was so good to see her. I expressed to her my loneliness I feel in coming back to school, how i feel like i dont have anyone really close to me here, and feel so very on my own and without a close close friend. She understood me completely and i know that i have her. I just need to make more time for her.
still i do feel like i am alone. when greer is in cali, julia goes back to nh, and bf is so far away...it just feels kind of empty. but i know all of these pieces will be coming together and this can be a good reflection time to work on me, and of course focus on school which on day 2 is already stressing me out. i have no idea how im going to pass the HESI exam, NCLEX, let alone every single quiz, test, lab check-off, preceptorship, and 4 patient clinical rotation.
guess ill do it somehow
p.s. see aunt lucy, i didnt complain about you on here!!! (i know you're faithfully reading!)
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